4 Things I Learned from Not Seeing My Husband for A Week

I enjoyed my alone time but I realised something important.

Ellen Nguyen
4 min readSep 19, 2022


Photo by Azlan Baharudin on Unsplash

Last week, my husband was on a management work trip.

I know — it’s not a long time, but it was the first time we were away from each other for longer than a day.

We met a few years ago and quickly became inseparable. We moved in with each other right before the first lockdown in the UK back in 2020. It felt natural to spend all the time together.

Before him, I’d never lived with a partner before. I had never even spent many days in a row with anyone. So it amazed me how quickly I got used to being with my husband.

When he was away, it was interesting for me to observe myself. Now that he’s back and I’ve had a chance to reflect, here are 4 things I’ve learned about myself and relationships during this time:

1. “If he wanted to, he would.”

People often accept a lack of communication when a partner is away. But it’s not the case with my husband.

He texted me and sent me photos every day. He called me during the day and before bed. I didn’t feel anxious at all about our distance.

His work trip was crazily intense but it was true that “if he wanted to, he would.” He has been this way since the very beginning of our relationship: available, responsive, and consistent.

So some advice for daters out there: Don’t make excuses for bad behaviours or a lack of communication if that doesn’t meet your needs.

2. Admitting I wanted closeness was the best thing I’d done for my love life.

I used to worry about coming across as clingy and needy, but as I changed my dating approach and acknowledged my needs and wants, I put closeness and daily communication with my partner at the top of my list because it was my truth.

I wanted someone who lived in the same city and loved spending time together as much as I did, which became a non-negotiable. I stopped accepting “busy job”, “frequently traveling” or “only visiting for a business trip.” When I heard any of that, I was simply out.



Ellen Nguyen

Freelance writer & digital creator | London based | Psychology BSc. Editor of LovefulMind.com, empowering women.