Hi Steve, I see your points and I'm glad these situations work out for you but I doubt it's the case for most people, especially women. Exes are not like friends, you have a history with each other, and for many people that history can be very complicated and damaging, they can't just engage with exes in the present and take those connections as they are without being held back from living their lives. It's worth noting that for straight women, male exes don't bring the same value to women as female exes to men outside of romantic/sexual context. How many straight men you say would genuinely, sincerely invest in a beneficial platonic friendship with their exes? It's not common. Anyway, how I see it, it's not about the right or wrong way to handle an ex, so I'm not trying to change your mind, it's about taking a stance that we think is best for us.