There were times I thought about death.
I was crying in front of my sister, telling her that I did not know what my purpose of living was. I complained about how things were not happening for me and all I had was just the dullness of everyday life.
At that point, as a university kid, I didn’t understand just how easy it is for a life to be taken. Or I probably forgot.
I forgot that I was there when my grandfather, who raised me and without whom I wouldn’t be the one I am now, got into a road accident and passed away a few months later. And I was there when my sister told me that our uncle had Cancer and the family needed to be prepared for the worst outcome.
It was when I registered that life is constantly changing.
Perhaps, we don’t notice because we’re so carried away with trivialities and overwhelmed by the stress of our daily responsibilities, but it’s happening.
Right at this moment, hundreds of babies are being born and others are having their last moments.
Some are abusing, stabbing, shooting, and killing others; many are battling loneliness, depression, cancer, or fighting for their lives inside ICU— everywhere in this world.
That we cannot see something doesn’t mean it’s not there.
Or, perhaps, we refuse to see.
There are times our minds lean towards death. But only when we are staring right at it do we realise how ridiculous we have been to even entertain it.
We might not know our purpose of being born into life, but we know one thing for sure — when a tragedy strikes, it’s our instinct to feel fear and grief.
It wakes up all our senses and ignites in us a passion for life.
We feel relieved because it didn’t affect us. We feel scared because it might happen to us and our family. We don’t want it to happen. We want safety and peace. We desire to live, and it’s just natural that we strive to live so much.
Yet, it’s a shame that only in a moment like this could we grasp the significance of life.
Every day, I have food to eat, I have friends to call, I go to work, my family is safe and I’m healthy — how wonderful it is.
The unthinkable can happen at any time to any of us; so, right at this moment, I’m grateful and happy because I have had today to live and every day is another chance to do the right things.